Today I'm struck with a terrible and lonely thought. I can push and beg and plead and try, but sometimes no matter how hard I try, no matter how much I keep hoping, I still mean less and less everyday to the people I want to love me the most. A distant thought. An old memory. Time moves forward and takes people with it. New thoughts, new people, new memories they take the place of long gone ones. But of course, being the eternally hopeful, I still try. All the same. Hoping that even across the distance I'll feel less alone, less like the forgotten misfit. Less like I don't matter. Do they all realize how badly I need them? Do they see how lost I am and just ignore it with a simple, "awe" and "bless her little heart"? Or is it worse, do they not even notice at all? Probably not. Guess the point is simple:
Try try as hard as you may, sometimes you're just born to be on the outside looking in...
and that's incredibly depressing.
But that's how Jesus and Peter Pan lived, so that's something...
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